Thursday, 3 June 2010

Decisions Decisions

Yesterday I received a call from a local recruitment agency about a job that to be honest would be perfect for me, 3 days a week, local and I actually have the skills and experience for it and the money is good, well it would have been perfect 6 months ago when I was looking.

Things have changed now, I’ve definitely changed. I actually making an income from blogging, not that ever thought I would do and would really like to peruse that more. I’ve started dabbling with fiction not that I think one second that I will get published but I find it an excellent release and find my writing has really improved and that makes me really proud of myself. That sounds really stupid doesn’t it, let me explain.

When I was 21 I went back to college to do an access course, after I had written my first English Lit essay it was returned with ‘This is not an essay’ written on it. My writing was horrendous, I can’t spell very well and it was just terrible. I was sent to special English lessons so I could learn to form sentences correctly and learn the basics again; how I passed my GCSE’s and a AS level I will never know. So you see I never foresaw that I would be writing anything and I never thought I would be paid to do it.

After the phone call yesterday I of course went on twitter when a wise lady called Karin (cafebebe) tweeted’ I guess you have to determine what your DREAM is. Will this job help you get it?’ the simple answer to that is No.  The problem is I’m not sure what my dream is, I’ve tried different roles and even though I’ve done well in them none have really excited to me.

What do I want to be when I grow up? That’s such a tough question, I suppose my absolute dream job would be to write about music, be a music reviewer, go to gigs, and listen to new music that would be awesome. I have never told anyone that before and its quite liberating.

I spoke to OH about it last night and we discussed money etc and even if I didn’t make another penny from blogging we are OK finically at the moment. There is also a possibility that we will be moving away from the area. So this morning I said thanks but no thanks.

I love being at home with BG, I know sometimes it’s hard and I just want to go out and be Carol not BG’s mum but I wouldn’t swap this time with her for anything. I want a chance to explore writing a bit more and see what I can achieve. I’m even thinking of doing an OU course next year in creative writing.

For the time being I’m staying at home with BG as a Full-Time mum and a Part-Time blogger and it feels good.



  1. Good on you love...thank you for the mention and I'm glad you've come to a decision that makes you happy! Brilliant, about that dream... ;)


    PS- "wise lady"...does that mean I'm old?? ;)

  2. Good for you! If you can do what you love. Also with BG, trust me they are little for such a tiny period it's worth spending with them, blink and it's gone. Proud of you xx

  3. weldone on making that decision hun, I know it wasn't easy. And you are a great writer xxx

  4. Good for you Carol, only you know what is best for you and your family, well done for having the courage of your convictions.xx

    Goodluck with the writing.

  5. Good on you - its nice to have made a decision and to know that its the right one

    p.s. tagged you over at mine (

  6. Brilliant I'm sure I can help you out in the future with the music side of things. In the mean time why don't you start a website just for music and start reviewing CDs? I can get some sent to you to get you going!

  7. Karin - I didn't mean old just clever! Whats wrong with my dream?

    Liz@violetposy - Thank you hun. I love being with her and seeing her grow up.

    Carly - Thank you hun x

    Lorraine - Thanks hun, It feels good like I have a purpose now.

    Muddling Along Mummy - Thank you, it feels good. Thanks for the tag x

    Rock n roll mummy - OOh another blog? Interesting....what will I call it???
    CD's would be great hun x

  8. That is fantastic. Good for you. I am so happy you have made a decision which is right for you. xx

  9. Well done on making a really hard decision :)

    Although we need to talk about thsi "move", nothing has been authorised by me ;) lol xx

    Love ya Nim xx

  10. You have to do what you're comfortable with x Well done on making a decision you're happy with :)

    I'm hoping to do a OU Creative Writing course next year too :D

  11. Good for you. I think you've done really well. You've quietly plugged away and carved out opportunities for yourself - good for you. It's a lot easier when you listen to yourself and go for it - you'll make things happen.

  12. I don't know about you but I am nearly 40 now and truth be told, I think we grow up thinking there is a 'something I want to do with the rest of my life', there is a 'the one' and there is a happily ever after. But is there? And does there need to be? For some people, they find that job they love doing forever, for others, they find the person they're happy with until they die but there are just as many people out there who find that this isn't the case and that the constant searching for it and ensuing disappointments make life miserable - and frustrating. And isn't there just so much pressure in the assumption these things exist? Personally, I am at that point where I am really happy doing what I'm doing and will do it for as long as it makes me happy. And then I'll try something else. Why not do the same? Just try what you enjoy and see where it takes you and forget trying to determine if it's what you want for the rest of your life. Simply by doing what you enjoy you may one day wake up and realise you've found it anyway.

    Cheers! Alli

  13. Its great about you doing what you want to do! (I feel the same way however right now we are not in the best financial situation for me to not work). And you are a brilliant writer :) A friend told me recently "It is never too late to be what you might have been" George Eliot. And I keep that in mind everyday!! x

  14. I would love to be able to make an income out of blogging, please do share you tips. I really would second that they grow up so fast I wouldnt change a thing about the time I have spent with the boys. I have been able to influence them so much and also enjoy them

  15. Well done on making a very tough decision!

    Please come write for my new website!! - you can even write about new music (for kids) and I'll introduce you to some proper music journalists & local musicians too.

  16. Hi Carol, doesn't it feel great when you make a decision that's completely yours, rather than just going along with someone else's decision that sort of fits, but not quite?

    What do I want to be when I grow up? Like Alli, I think it can be many things - aren't women famous for multitasking after all? I like to think of it as a treasure hunt.

    If one of your dreams is to write about music go for it, dream big and have fun exploring!

  17. Hi Carol,
    No I'm not totally retarded, but the sun is shining and my brain is suffering from "I want to be outside" syndrome.. hence the invitation to write for a website you've already said you'll write for. Duh. I'll send you an email later!

  18. Bless you love - you are right to go for what will make you happy - the time I have had with my two at home, despite the circs has been the best time ever. Like you I'm not quite sure where my studies will take me but being happy sure beats being stressed at a job that is only ok and takes me away from them. And good for OH for supporting you in all that you do - can't wait to meet him and the wee darling! take care xoxo

  19. Congratulations on your decision. It can be hard to determine what our dreams are and even harder to follow them. Good luck in your endeavours, sounds like you're making great progress already!

  20. Thank you all for you fantastic and supportive comments, you are all great and I love you!!


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