Thursday, 30 September 2010

F*cked Off Thursday - Yet another way to make mothers feel guilty

I'm just warning you in advance this is going to be a full on rant and there may be swearing.

Today in the Guardian is this article called Bottle-Feeding Babies Can Lead To Adult Obesity, says Study, great another way to make Mother's you didn't breastfeed their children feel guilty.

I desperately tried to breastfeed BG, she would not breastfeed! And I mean would not, every time she put to me breast she screamed and screamed and screamed. Eventually after her losing 10% of her birth weight in 3 days I bottle feed her. I expressed constantly for two weeks then gave up and she stayed on formula. 

I am fucked off being made to feel like a huge failure that my child wasn't breastfeed. Constant reports telling us Breast Is Best and now we are going to make out children obese. I am well aware breast milk is one of the best ways to feed your baby, however it is not the only choice and mothers have the right to choice what is right for them without people judging and jumping on their backs. 

Its even worse when you have tried and failed for whatever reason and then people make you feel like you are the worse mother in the world. Why not try supporting us or asking why we aren't breastfeeding (in a non judgemental way )you may be surprised by the answers.

As for this report, BG knows when she is full, she doesn't over feed and never did. She is a healthy toddler, who enjoys a good range of food and does a lot if exercise, I am not concerned that she will be obese. 

And breath, rant over, as you where. 



  1. I was bottle fed - look at the size of me. As far as I'm concerned this is just another piece of crap we shouldn't be made to listen to!

  2. Oh don't get me going on this one! I do beleive that BF is best but it doesn't work for everyone including me. I was offered no help or support from any medical staff whatsoever! I remember askng the health visitor how much formula I should be giving and she pretty much refused to answers. I could go on and on but won't.

  3. Please just ignore them and read these new reports instead.

    Eating too much junk food may lead to obesity too.
    But Research may lead to swearing.
    Shops may lead to buying things.
    And alcohol may lead to getting pissed.

  4. I don't personally get the big deal ? The paper is reporting a fact . It could just as easily be saying the sky is blue ...
    Should newspapers not report these stories ? Its not about making you or anyone else feel bad but reporting scientific findings .
    Should no reports about breastfeeding be allowed in newspapers?

  5. What annoys me the most was the research was done back in the 90's and doesn't even compare Breastfeed babies against bottle fed babies.

  6. I didn't want to breastfeed either of my children and I don't regret it at all. At the end of the day it is the mothers choice how to feed her baby. I had numerous amount of nasty comments from health profesionals about not feeding my babies myself. It really did make me cross. How to feed your baby is a MOTHERS choice not anybody else's. Maybe these scientists should invest their time and money into studies that are actually going to help people instead of criticsing.

  7. Sometimes are simply too dumb to cross the line they do not know of, Breastfeeding simply doesn't work for everybody.

  8. I had exactly the same problem as you and as much as I tried Chick would just not have it! It really annoys me that health visitors will only talk about breast feeding! What happened to choice???

  9. I fed for three months and really didn't enjoy it. I had mastitis twice and really didn't get the whole 'bonding connection' thing. I felt gutted that this earth mother like trait had escaped me and when I finally gave up it was only with the support of my sister in law who shared her experiences with me and reassured me that the guilt and pressure I was putting on myself was the only unhealthy thing. she was right mum and baby were far happier on formula and I wouldn't make that same mistake again.
    Breast can be best but only if it suits both mum and baby. Happiness is the most important thing, not where the milk comes from.

  10. I was formula fed and have had 3 babies and am still a size 10, weighing less than I did before my first pregnancy (I'm a skinny cow who wishes she had bigger breasts!)! I reckon genes & lifestyle play a much more important role in obesity. I feel for you being made to feel guilty - hey, love is best, no matter bottle or breast. xx

  11. I totally understand how you feel! I struggled to breastfeed my eldest daughter and it was a really awful experience for us both. With my second daughter, I breastfed for 2 weeks and then went straight to bottle feeding. Both are gorgeous, healthy and fantastic girls (now aged 14 and 10!). Forget all the stupid headlines and just remember to trust your instincts. You are the mother and you know best! Gx

  12. Yeah, I'd imagine that obesity has a lot to do with the diet they're on once they're on solid food, rather than whether they were breast or bottle fed as babies.
    I remember reading on a forum once a comment from a breastfeeder. Somebody had posted about making homecooked meals for their baby, rather than jars. The breastfeeder said it was "ironic" that they cared so much about what solid food they gave their baby "and yet" didn't mind giving them formula! So offensive!
    In my case I tried to breastfeed my first but couldn't keep up with her demands. I was more realistic with my second and decided to do combination feeding so that she would get breastmilk for as long as possible. I managed to 13 weeks and was very impressed with myself!
    However, healthy eating is a lifelong habit and is about much more than what milk a baby is given, yes, we know breast is best but, like you say, some people can't breastfeed, and (shock!) some people don't want to. Doesn't make them the world's most evil parents who don't care about their children's health and nutrition!!
    *rant over*


  13. I call bullshit. Both my boys have been bottle fed. Zack was (still is) tongue tied and just couldn't latch on. Max was born with a tooth. Nuff said.
    Both my boys are an average size. I've always been terrified that they would be big kids with me being on the more, eh... cuddly... side. Luckily they both adore being outside and very active, and are, if anything, on the slim/lanky side!
    I was breastfed, and am huge btw... so I definitely call bullshit. ;)

  14. Me and my brother were both bottle fed from the first feed, my brother is so skinny he has to have his suit trousers made for him and I am a healthy size 10-12, probably because I was taught about a healthy diet from a young age. I didnt want to breast feed my 2, but both were prem and I was advised to try and give them at least 3 weeks worth of breast milk. I managed that but not much else, and didnt beat myself up about it. i was pressurised and I was really angry about it, like others have said it has to suit both mum and baby and is a choice. if formula was bad for babies why do the guidelines and regulatory bodies allow it to be produced in the first place. My 2nd son was put down as failure to thrive within weeks of birth and I was told to put him on formala by the medical professionals. Someone should publish the studies done on both formual fed babies, and breast fed ones

  15. I tried breast feeding my daughter for two days, even got sent to a breast feeding clinic in the hospital. I tried and tried, was so upset that she wouldn't take to it, she was getting so upset where she was so hungry. I was getting upset cos i felt like it was my fault. It wasn't until 10 minutes past midnight of her second day that a midwife came in to the ward, i think she must have been the 6th one to try and help me breast feed that night, she put her finger in Harriets mouth and then told me that the reason my daughter couldn't breast feed was because she was born with a cleft palate. I tried for days to express with a machine the hospital gave me to take home, with no luck and had to use formula. She is now 4 and half and is not obese or even over weight.

  16. quite right love - I breastfed both of mine because i could - one eats like a horse and is a beanpole the other not so much as him and has my build at her age (14 -not skinny - not fat) and exercises all the time! This guilt-tripping mothers is just so unnecessary and counter-productive as is weighing children at school and sending letters home if they are 1 pound over the ideal weight! There is nothing wrong with formula milk - just the morons that judge people for using it. I had a health visitor tell me off for giving my son goats milk cos he was allergic to formula and dairy - she felt i should have continued breast feeding despite the fact he starting biting my boobs which was why I stopped at 18 months!! Needless to say he is active, healthy and I have no idea where he puts all the food he eats - he is 11. Children thrive on love and care and a balanced diet - whateversource it is from! (Incidently my mother had 4 children all of whom were bottle fed and grew up all different shapes and sizes!).


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